WARNING: Satire ahead.

Dear Brain Injury,

Never in a million years would I have thought I would encounter someone like you. You make my head spin; my mind does loops when I think about you. And as much as I try to concentrate on other things like friends, family, food or even what I’m going to wear tomorrow, you’re always at the forefront of my thoughts, erasing every other thing that dares enter my mind.

Is it the blank stares that makes my heart skip a beat? The ones that I get from strangers when I forget something we were just talking about? Maybe, but it’s more likely the sense of insecurity you instill in me. The feeling that makes me hold back what I want to say for fear of repeating myself. Oh, how I love the awkward silences and personal connections I’ve lost because of you. The way you make my voice crawl back inside my throat, just when I think I can chime in on conversations, because I know I’ll sound utterly unintelligent gives me such a thrill.

I don’t know how I lived so much of my life without you. Holding on to conversations I had with others was an inconvenience and I’m so happy that you’ve alleviated that daily stress. You’ve made me question everything I used to know, often more than once. I love the uncertainty I feel around you. You incomplete me.

Even with all of your redeeming qualities, you still constantly surprise me. You fill me with hope when you’re able to recall a small detail, only to shut down at the most important moments. Living a life with you is living a life on the edge; it may be difficult but there’s always a new challenge that you can’t quite seem to overcome, and the adrenaline is absolutely savory.

What I’m trying to say here, valentine, is that if I had to be with anyone on this special day, it most certainly wouldn’t be you. So thank you for allowing me to see that other challenges I’ve faced were not as critical as they once seemed. As far as life struggles go, you are the only one for me. 

Your Valentine,

Casey

 

Advertisements

2 thoughts on “Love letter to my brain injury

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s